I didn't go on the date. Honestly it was because I was scared. I bailed big time. I feel like I'm still hung up on baby daddy. Someday I know I will be able to move on but it is just so incredibly hard! I never thought I would be the person to want to stay in a very unhealthy relationship. But I am, I do.
I see baby daddy sporadically, and fight with him often. He has probably changed Evalynn 5 times and fed her like 3 times. Its so frustrating.
When she is older she is gonna love her daddy because he is "fun" aka no disciple. It won't matter to her that I tell her no because I love her. She also will never know about the fights we had over whether or not she was his baby. I always knew 100% she was his. It has been like every fight we have that he tries to deny her. Then, when we are good, she looks just like his other kids, him, ect. Yesterday we almost got in a fight because he denied denying her! I think most of the time we fight when he is really drunk, so maybe he doesn't remember, but I do. I just want Evalynn to have a good relationship with me and her daddy. And I want us to have a good relationship for her. I just need to realize that I don't need him to be my romantic partner anymore, just my parenting partner.
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